Ouch.

Ugh. You know, I don't mean to bring the world down. You know? But still. My heart hurts and I thought maybe here would be the place I could say something and not regret it. My best friend, my closest girl, my sister..... well, she's been in the hospital for a few weeks. She was in a car accident. It was raining, the streets were wet. She slipped up and crashed into a light pole. Head on. On the drivers side. I can't. I can't. The night I got that call I bawled, bawled. The call came around 1am. I don't think I slept at all that night. It was the night before Chris Young.

She's been in a coma since then, every day declining in health rapidly. The doctors and her parents agreed that if her heart stopped beating, they wouldn't want to revive her. It felt to me as though they were giving up on her. But you wonder, you know, if really, they would want to be revived, if they're doomed to a life of never being what they used to.

My baby girl was pronounced brain dead this morning at 4:23 am. I'm out of town, in a hotel room with my father. I can't cry. I can tell anyone how much I'm hurting. All I want to do is break down and I can't. I can't do that.

Maybe it's for the best. Maybe she's happy. But I'm not. I'm dying. I hurting like I've never hurt before. "It's like a death inside the family, like she stole my way to breathe."

Erika.