New Year

I cannot believe that 2010 is OVER! It's OVER! Gone.. history. I swear yesterday was like January. This year went by way to fast and while it had it's ups and downs I wouldn't trade it for the world. I lost some friends, lost myself, found out who my true friends are, found myself, chased my dream, worked my butt of trying to get them in perspective, made some bonds I'll never forget with some people I'll never forget, found weakness and fought harder, found strength and made sure it wasn't breakable, had moments I'll regret but found ways to see it through, and most of all, I found people I can't live without that push me through each and every day.

January - My aunt Joni was still living with us in January. For those who don't know the story, she came to live with us last August when she was having troubles with her lower back joints and stuff. She went home in January, after 5 months of living with us down here. She lives in Kaysville and is improving with her back but is still not 100%.
Andrew also turned 14 in January. ANDREW. My brother.. man it's gonna be so weird when he gets his learners permit next year.

February - Well, after Joni left I must say I kinda went into this little like depression state. It wasn't like depression depression but I was just sad and sick all the time. Everyone who knows me knows that though.
I don't remember much of February, just being home a lot dying of stomach pains that now I'm not sure were even there. That little while definitely strengthened me a lot and it's something I won't do to myself again.
I got to go to Sea World in February as well. Just a short trip for my father and I :) San Diego stuff.. fun fun:)
I do remember I bought my first Sugarland album in May, later returning to buy the other three I didn't have.. (stuck that in just for you, Holly) ;)

March - March was actually a surprisingly good month. I was able to mostly pull myself out of whatever I was doing to myself and enjoy time with my family and friends again. In March I started following a user on Youtube by the name of hollycheerbb22. Yeah, Holly Paige Lawson. Though at this point in time, I really didn't like her voice all that much. I felt like she was pushin' it too hard.

April - Nothing exciting happened it April. I can't even remember April for all I know.

May - May... One of my penpals died from a car crash in May. But that didn't scar me all too much. Still miss her but not as much as Ansley or Kat.
I got accepted into Student Council, first semester, in May. I was super excited and couldn't wait for the new school year to start, even though the one we were in was just ending.
I survived elementary and graduated from the 6th grade. That was "exciting".
Anyways, the only thing I really remember about May is Memorial Day. The family all went to my grandma's for a barbecue. I wasn't feeling too well that day but I still went. I'm glad I did. In the middle of our barbecue we started planning out what we all wanted to do for the Fourth of July. The rest of the family wanted to get together on the 3rd because the 4th was on a Sunday this year.. but I couldn't do that because I was going to Stadium of Fire on the Third.
Now, before I continue the story, you must know a little bit about the next character in the story. I've talked about her all too much before but she's my life. Vivian Wayman, born March 14, 40 years old. She's always been an adopted family member but I never knew much about her. I minded my own business and she didn't seem to care to get to know me either.
But anyways, Vivian pipes up about Stadium of Fire, asking how we got tickets and stuff. She had really wanted to go. I don't know how it ended this way, but when we were done, it was Vivian and I going instead of my dad and I going.
I thought this was a little odd considering I barely knew her, but I was okay with it. Someone who actually appreciated the kind of music we were going to listen to.
Later, I was on the computer upstairs when Vivian and my Grandpa came up. He was showing Vivian a song or something and eventually in ended in us singing together around the computer. She had the most amazing voice. Ever. Besides Holly of course but anyways. I remember we ended the night fighting over boxes of Junior Mints:)

June - I didn't hear from Vivian past then. For a while I thought we were totally just kidding about her coming to the concert with me but I didn't care.. either way was fine with me. A lot of people died in June but I didn't let myself feel anything because I didn't want it to ruin what I had worked for back in February. June was spent teaching myself how to play guitar. I learned a lot more than I thought I could, getting down the basic chords and simple strumming patterns. I got my grandpa's old guitar to work on and I was soon able to play some simple Carrie Underwood and Sugarland songs. Were they right.. probably not, but hey, I felt pretty accomplished.
I cut my hair in June as well, shorter than I had it but no layers yet.

July - July. July changed my life. That's the best way to put it. It started with Stadium of Fire. Vivian came, we went to dinner downtown at the festival, (I met Brit there, who I hadn't seen in like FOREVER, and I was like wayyy insanely excited) and then we went off to the Stadium. I learned a lot about her that night. I couldn't get enough of her hugs and later she sent me an email saying she couldn't get enough of mine either. Carrie Underwood performed and by the end we were both up on our feet dancing and singing 'till our lungs couldn't take it anymore. I remember the feeling of being in her arms that night... I never knew a hug could feel that good. Like a hug could fix everything.
That next Monday was our family party, and Vivian showed up. I brought my guitar and we spend a little while playing it, enjoying ourselves. I still was pretty limited to what I could play, considering the fact I hadn't had any official lessons yet. It was fun anyways and I didn't want to go home. While we were there, Vivian asked my dad if he would let her take me to a concert that weekend.
So that Friday, I was seeing Restless Heart in concert. I must say it was enjoyable, though I didn't know any of the songs I had the most wonderful time there with her. My grandparents came as well but all I remember is sitting next to Vivian listenin' to her sing.
The next night I knew there was a band performing that she wanted to see. So there I was again, Saturday night, at the Sandy Amphitheater, singing at the top of my lungs. I got a call during the concert that a friend of mine was dying, and she was gone by the end of the concert. It really helped to have Vivian there. That was a good concert.
We went to a concert every weekend in July.. though we might have missed one because of girls camp or something. My favorite was the Charley Jenkins one... I love his songs and stuff.
At the end of June I got to take a trip with my dad to CA. We went to San Louis Obispo, Monterey, San Fransisco, and Sacramento. It was lots of fun.
Also in July I went to my first year of Girls Camp. I was pretty sick that week but it was still a lot of fun. My best friend in our beehive group didn't come so I was pretty sad about that. I enjoyed it though, but it was a week I don't wish to repeat.

August - The first week of August was our last concert at the amphitheater. Due West was in concert, one of my favorite bands. I had a huge surprise for Vivian that night. I had been saving up all summer to get her a guitar. I know she was looking at playing but.. I don't know.. I was just feeling like I wanted to do something for her to thank her for all the stuff she had done for me that summer. So I got her a guitar. She was so surprised and I was so excited. That night we were both in tears a bit:) Happy tears.
I started my first year in Middle School in August. I absolutely love middle school. So much better than elementary. I do miss some of my little friends that are growing up now but I live. In August I auditioned for the school play and made it. We started rehearsals right away and immediately I loved it. It was time consuming and some days were hard but I still enjoyed it a lot. I made some really good friends from that play.
In August I bought Holly's CD and began to get to know her really well. She was so sweet to me, being like 4 years younger than her and immediately she was like an older sister to me. I love her.
I also got published for the sixth time in August in a book that my friend, Miriam, is also published in. That was fun:)
I also was able to compete in my first talent competition in August. I really enjoyed it though I was off tune a bit when I performed. Oh well, there's always next time.

September - September was Caroline's birthday, so we had this major like practically two day sleep over. Way fun.
Not much happened in September, I was super busy with the play and things. I did take up voice lessons and (finally) guitar lessons in September. Both of which I really enjoy.
I cut my hair in September. That was fun.

October - was Katelyn's 18th birthday. We celebrated, let balloons go up at the cemetery.
October also brought around UEA Break so my family (well, except for my mom who stayed home to babysit the dogs) went to CA. Disneyland:) It was way fun.

November - November brought around show time for the play. Vivian surprised me by coming and Brit was there opening night. Mrs. H. came as well and other friends from other stuff. It was lots of fun and I hope everyone who came enjoyed it. I'm still super sad it is over and I hope it will be just as wonderful next year, and I hope that I will be able to be in it. It was way too fun not to do it again. Lots of hard work but it payed off and I don't regret it.
Turkey Day was fun in November:) I stuffed myself but it was an enjoyable stuff.:)

December - My birthday is in December. This year I got a guitar and a few other things:) It was really a fun birthday, though my dad was out of town for my actual birthday. I was able to sleep over with Caroline again and that was really fun. We had a Twilight marathon, because she had never seen the movies and I wanted to see the third.
I also got my wisdom teeth out recently. Pain! I was throwing up on Christmas Eve but felt much better by Christmas.
Just yesterday I cut my hair. A new look for the new year.


Now that 2010 is over, I'm really looking forward to 2011. I'm going to put my heart to something and achieve it. I'm going to get off my lazy butt and do something about what I want to do.

My resolutions..

1. Drop 20 pounds by March
2. Be able to do bar chords and power chords on guitar
3. Strengthen my voice and vocal chords
4. Record my CD:)
5. Enjoy life:)
6. Stop being so annoying to some people
7. Don't be so easily annoyed
8. Spend more time with your family and friends
9. Spend less time on the computer
10. Continue to get good grades
11. Finally meet Holly Lawson
12. Chase down my dreams with all I've got and work my butt of to see them come true
13. Go to a Sugarland Concert
14. Write more
15. Share my writing more
16. Find something new that I love
17. Eat better
18. Smile and laugh more
19. Sleep more
20. Help others as much as I can

I'll update them more when I have more... :)

Thank you all for a great year of awesomeness:)

I hope you all have a fantastic 2011 filled with good health and endless possibilities!

I love you:)

Erika

Change of plans :)

For part of my Christmas/birthday present.. my dad offered to take me to Nashville in the Spring. I've always wanted to go to Nashville, I've been begging him to do it for soooooooo long. So he finally gave in. But I must say, last night, those plans changed.

You guys all know about Holly Lawson. I've posted about her a million times.

She's amazing.

Well last night we were talking about a show she's doing in March. I'd kill to be up there for her but I didn't think we could pull it off 'cause we're tight on money and I didn't think my dad would let me have two trips in the same month.

You know how the second it hits you, you know your idea is genius and actually could work if you pull it off correctly? This was one of those ideas.

So with a little compromising and stuff... instead of Nashville I'm going to MI this Spring.

To see Holly. Holly Lawson. Holly Paige Lawson.

I'm going to die if I really have to wait until March.

OH MY GOSH I'M SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Like extremely.


But anyways.

You know those friends that just understand you because they've been through the same thing? I learned that about Holly last night. She's so much like me it's almost scary. She's sooooo sweet to me, I feel so stupid because me with all my stupid 13 year old comments and she's almost 17... the poor girl has to put up with me sooo much, ha ha. But boy do I love her. She's always just so amazing to me, compliments me all the time and is always there if I need anything from her, and she always pulls through for me. Last night she even like seriously offered to pay my way up to MI just to see her. She said she could have it paid off by February... I can't believe she was willing to work for over two months for me. Me. Dang it she makes me feel special... like I'm finally really worth something to someone and someone cares to watch me succeed in all I do. I relate to her so well. She's more than a friend, more like the sister I never had. I love her so much, even she has no idea how much and she'll never know. =)

I love you Holly! I can't wait to see you <3

Erika

Everything is Temporary ♥

Merry Christmas ♥

I hope you all had a wonderful holiday! I know I did! For Christmas I got TONS of sheet music and two hours of recording time in the Smile Productions Studio!!!!!!!! Um... I'm like TOTALLY EXCITED! And you know what's even better.... we're thinking of selling my cover CDs for a fundraiser for the COPE foundation. The COPE foundation is a foundation created in memory of a few special people who... you guessed it... lost their life to cancer. It's close to my heart because part of that foundation was created in memory of Ans. Yes, I know it's illegal to sell other peoples music... so you're not going to be paying for the music.. you pay for the shipping and the cost of the actual CD and stuff, lol. They'd probably be around $5 but we're still working that out soooooooo... we'll see.

Also for Christmas I got some Sugarland Merch, some new jackets and shirts and stuff, lots of music, and some new software to record stuff on my computer. And I got a ton of necklaces. They are my new obsession. I love necklaces. =)

You know what hurts really bad? Getting your wisdom teeth removed the day after you have an orthodontist appointment and two days before Christmas. Yes. I'm 12 and I've had my wisdom teeth removed. Honestly, I just went in to have surgery on my twelve year old molar because I have a molar missing and it makes my mouth really unbalanced with one on top and not one on bottom. So I had to have that top one out. And then my mom decided that while they were putting me to sleep anyways they should take my wisdom teeth out. Awesome. I was in so much pain. Yesterday I spent vomiting because my stomach didn't like the pain medication. I'm feeling so much better today though. I'm eating more solid foods and finally singing and playing guitar again.

Which brings us around to tonight. Singing and playing guitar. Vivian came over. Yeah. I had no idea. Boy was I surprised. I was in my room, door closed, cleanin' my disgusting room, singin' at the top of my lungs and she just like walks in.... I died. Lol. It's true. I haven't seen her in maybe 2 or 3 months. So me, in all my puffy swollen face glory, had the best Christmas afternoon ever singing and playing guitar with the most amazing lady I've known <3 That was fun. I love you Vivs!!

I love songwriting.

I love Taylor.

I love Holly Paige Lawson.

I love Miriam Castle.

And Anna Wallace.

Don't forget Ans.

And everyone else. ;)

And Brit. I miss her.

I love Little Big Town.

And Sugarland.

Not to mention Reba.

Country music.

I love you.

You. Right there.

Thanks for radiating your awesomeness to me.

Merry Christmas everyone! Don't forget the reason for the season. This is to the little baby who lay in a manger that first Christmas night... ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Erika

We will start with the good news...

Taylor is cancer free. And so is Zowie. Happy holidays =)

My birthday was last Friday.. good day =)

I love Nicole Lovell.

And Holly Paige Lawson.

Bad news....

Ans died yesterday morn.

RIP

We love you girl

Erika

Heroes - Round 2

Zowie Kile was born January 8th, 2004. When she was two years old, she was short on breath and kept complaining about leg pain. When the doctors performed a leukemia test, it was confirmed in minutes. Usually they take no less than a half an hour to confirm. On January 10, 2007, Zowie began her first battle with cancer. But soon, on February 18 of the same year, Zowie was declared cancer free. Her family moved to Missouri and she began to attend preschool. A year and three weeks later, Zowie was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance to begin her second battle with cancer. Months were spent at a hospital in Tennessee, saving Zowie's life. On December 23rd, 2009, Zowie received the best Christmas present she could have. Zowie was given new bone marrow. The transplant went successfully and she was declared cancer free on April 2 of this year. Then, just a few months later on September 7th, Zowie relapsed for a third time. Now Zowie is again fighting for her life. In her case, the third time isn't the charm, as the cancer has come back over twice as effective as the first relapse. Her family says they are just thankful for every day they get with her.

Taylor Nicole Love entered this world on June 27th, 2005. She was a beautiful, blue eyes, blond haired, cheerful girl. When she was 18 months old, on December 12, '06, Taylor was hospitalized and diagnosed with Stage IV Neuroblastoma. Since her diagnosis Taylor has endured countless procedures, biopsies, blood transfusions and stays in the hospital. She has undergone 7 rounds of high dose chemotherapy, a surgery to remove a tumor in her abdomen and a stem cell harvest. She has completed several rounds of a phase I clinical trial which included immunotherapy treatment and IV radiation. She had undergone radiation treatments to her head, orbits and abdomen and is currently undergoing treatment in a phase II antibody trial at Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center in NYC.
This year, Taylor was diagnosed with a second cancer, Chemo-Induced Leukemia. In August she had a dangerous but successful bone marrow transplant, and is now home and healing. She is doing wonderfully, as good as she's felt in years. We love you Tay!

Look at the little kids I've posted about. I call them heroes. They go through so much more than we know. And that's just the beginning.

Every 3 1/2 minutes a child is diagnosed with cancer.

Every 4 hours a child with cancer dies.

Yes. Every four hours.

About one in 300 boys and one in 333 girls will develop cancer before the age of 20.

Currently there are approximately 40,000 children undergoing cancer treatment in the US.

Only 13% of those children are likely to survive.

40,000. I've only introduced you to five.

Childhood cancer receives less than 3% of government cancer research funding. Breast Cancer gets almost 85% of the funds.

For every 6 research dollars per patient with AIDS, a child with cancer receives 30 cents.

September is Childhood Cancer Awareness Month, which nationally goes unrecognized.

I don't understand why we can't do more.

Help us fight for the cure.

Make a donation if you can, please. Every dollar makes a difference. I can tell you honestly.

Erika

Taylorlove.org

http://laylagrace.org

Heros - Round 1

This is Layla Grace. She was born November 26, 2007. In May of 2009, Layla was diagnosed with Stage IV Neuroblastoma. Treatment started right away. Over the space of 10 months, Layla underwent 7 rounds of chemotherapy, 11 surgeries, multiple blood transfusions, a bone marrow harvest and transplant, radiation, and lengthy hospital stays. After fervent prayers and too many close calls, Layla was announced cancer free. Then, on January 22 of this year, Layla relapsed for the first time. Despite the work of the doctors and the many prayers sent up in Layla's behalf, Layla earned her eternal wings and joined heaven's army on March 9th of this year. Today would be her 3rd birthday. We love and miss you Layla, xoxo.

The day after Layla died, four year old Angelina Dorsagno was diagnosed with the same form of cancer. Doctors found that the cancer had already metastasized, invading a majority of Lena’s tiny body. There were tumors in Lena’s brain, bones, spine, face, shoulder, femur, hips, and abdomen. Her family was informed that she needed to start chemo that very day.
Since March 10th, Lena has undergone six rounds of chemo and surgery to remove a large part of her main tumor. She has spent countless weeks in the hospital, away from her father, Brian, and his fiancé, Lisa, her stepfather, Matt and her four older siblings, Geno, Bella, Mia and Mya.
On September 7, the same day she was supposed to start Pre-K, Lena started the most intense part of her treatment, an autologous stem cell transplant with high dose chemo. Currently, she is on day three of the high dose chemotherapy. These high doses also carry high risks, but Lena and her family are keeping their faith.

You know that tight feeling in your chest after running a mile? That pressure that makes it hard to breath – the brick sitting there, warning you that it’s time to stop? Imagine, if you will not being able to ever catch your breath. Imagine something inside of you competing for the very breath you’re struggling to take. And now, imagine enduring this at only 6 months old.

March 4, 2009 Jaxon Kyle Wallace was born. He was a fighter from day one. Born six weeks early, the cards were already stacked against him, but Jaxon didn’t let that deter him. He learned to eat like a champ and went home after ten days in the NICU.

At Jaxon’s four-month check-up he was congested and coughing, but after medications and the regular use of a humidifier, his symptoms cleared up. Jaxon’s mom, Heather, noticed that although he was feeling better his breathing wasn't stable and very noisy. So at his six-month check-up she revisited the issue with Jaxon’s pediatrician. The doctor decided to do a chest x-ray – just to be safe.

What the x-ray revealed was a large tumor attached to the back of Jaxon’s right lung. When laid on his stomach, the tumor fell into his lung, putting pressure on his airway and causing the breathing that concerned Heather. Further testing showed that the tumor had also began to invade Jaxon’s spinal cavity, causing compression to his spinal cord.

At six months old, Jaxon had poison pumping through his veins. Chemotherapy that would make him nauseous, weak, and very sick. But don’t forget, Jaxon was born a fighter. And along with his parents, Heather and Kyle, and the doctors at Texas Children’s Hospital, an army was formed to fight the cancer trespassing in his little body. On September 8, 2009, Jaxon was officially diagnosed with Stage II Neuroblastoma.

Jaxon didn’t seem to notice that he was in the hospital. He took in his surroundings with innocent, wide-eyed curiosity, earning the name “The Little Observer” from his nurses and doctors. During his first two weeks at the hospital, Jaxon rolled over for the first time. This would be one of many tiny victories he would make throughout his treatment.

In June of this year, Jaxon was known as the little survivor. <3


Help us find a cure.

Erika

Thanksgiving

is today. I swear yesterday it was still October. This month has gone by WAAYY too fast. But anyways, happy Thanksgiving.

I can tell yah what I'm thankful for. I'm thankful for a warm house, a shelter. I'm thankful for my family that loves me. My friends. The rain. And sometimes, heaven forbid, even the snow. I'm forever grateful for music. Country music. Sugarland. Reba. All those guys =) I'm thankful for cute guys. What would our world be without them. I'm grateful for all the moments I can't remember that make me smile. I'm thankful for Brit, Caroline, Taylor, Faith, Kat, Ansley. Holly. Holly I owe a lot to. A lot of thanks. She's quite spectacular =) And Vivian. I owe her a lot of thanks for all the concerts we went to together last summer. I'm thankful for my phone. I'm thankful for laughter. Smiles. Tears. Christmas. Christmas decorations. Lyrics. Poetry. Challenges. I'm thankful for the Love family. <3

And whoever is reading this, I love you too.

I'm thankful for you.

Xoxo

Erika

Special Girls

We will start this post off with a video. Or shall I say a link to a video. A link to a video done by a very, very, very, very special friend of mine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgknSYq0yNs

This is kind of a two part post. First, let me tell you about Holly. Holly is the girl is the video. I started following her videos on Youtube a while back. She is an amazing country singer with so much potential that I'm certain that she'll be performing all over the country someday. She's a sweet, sweet girl who cares about others wholeheartedly. She's been so sweet to me and I've tried to support her in anyway I can. I love her a lot. If you like her videos, check out http://jennifernettlesnumb1fan.tumblr.com/ or http://hollylawsonfan.webs.com/. She is selling a cover CD for $8 if anyone is interested.
Anyways, she's quite a spectacular girl.

Now, onto the point of that video up there. I asked Holly to do a video for 10 year old Ansley a while ago. Ansley was diagnosed with a form of lung cancer at the beginning of this month. Ansley has been following Holly's videos with me for a while so I knew it'd mean the world to her if Holly would do a song for her on her Youtube account. When I was chatting with Holly one day I asked her if she would do it. A few days later, the video was up on Youtube. She even was kind enough to do Ansley's favorite song. I couldn't believe it for a while. This is a little girl Holly hadn't even heard of until I asked her to do it. She's never met her, never seen a picture of her, anything.

After the video was posted, I went over the the hospital to check on Ans and to show her the video. When I got there, Ans was crying because she was sooo sick and in so much pain. She barely had enough strength to give me a hug when I came in. The doctors came in and gave her some medication and stuff, but she was still in so much pain she couldn't stop crying. I decided to show her the video to try to cheer her up. I started talking to her about the video before I got it up, saying that Holly had done a video just for her. She was shocked. It was soo cute. When I got the video up, she immediately stopped crying. We watched the video, her smile growing until it reached ear to ear.

I received a letter from Ans & her mom today. Her mom told me about her progress, the chemotherapy and stuff like that. Enclosed in the letter was also a little thank you note that Ansley had written. She was so grateful for the video, saying how special she felt that it was a video just for her. <3

We need more special people like Holly in the world. That will make a difference with their talents.

I love you Holly.

I love you Ansley.

Xoxo
Erika

This Way to Wonderland...

I am actually, surprisingly, kind of really depressed that rehearsals and performances for the school play of "Alice in Wonderland" are over. You work at something so hard for almost 3 months and then, all of the sudden, it's just over. It's been so much fun. I've made so many new friends and have gotten to know them well. I will for sure miss this experience but I'm glad I was a part of it. I hope next year the new music director will pick a good play and good people to be in it, hopefully one of those good persons is me. ;) Thanks to all those who came to the performances, I hope you enjoyed the show as much as the cast enjoyed putting it on for you. Special thank you's to all the parents who helped out and especially to Mrs. Christensen for all the work and effort she put into this wonderful production. Thank you to the cast who worked so hard and made this such an enjoyable experience! I love you all so very much!

Thursday night was a pretty emotional night for me. 2 of my friends were going to come to the Wednesday dress rehearsal of "Alice in Wonderland" because they couldn't come to the actual show, and both ended up not being able to come Wednesday. Then, for whatever reason I'm not sure of, both of them showed up Thursday. Neither told me they were coming. I was just casually dancing onstage and saw them sitting in the audience. My mind went totally blank and I messed up on my dancing pretty badly but I recovered moderately well. It was so much fun to see them there. I was ecstatic. In between those times when I wasn't onstage I was in the drama room trying to hold back tears. I still can't believe they showed up just for me. Anyways, that was a pretty fantastic night.

Now that that's out of the way... 26 days until my birthday! Might as well start the countdown early. I'm anxious. I want to be 13. Ha, ha. Which that also means Christmas is coming up soon. I already have some of my Christmas shopping done =) You know those sales, can't miss 'em. Ha, ha. I got a special friend of mine a really beautiful angel necklace because she is such an angel to me. I hope she's not reading this post, ha, ha, that'd be bad. I can't wait to give it to her =)

I'm starting to hate the UPS guys. I won a signed Sugarland picture a few weeks ago and they said they shipped it like a month ago and it still hasn't come. Also, I'm waiting for some barrettes for a few friends of mine from Stef and they still haven't come either! I'm ticked! Hope they come soon.

I wrote a new song recently. It's been a while since I've done any writing. The song is called "Little Hands", and I recorded it so it's all amazing and everything. It's kind of a story song. From my perspective, it's a single mother writing about her child. Each verse is a different period in that child's life time. And the chorus talks about how she's doing all she can to support this child and how she wants to raise her child to be a strong girl. It's one of my favorite songs that I've written. I also wrote another one called "Promise Me", which I actually wrote kind of about one of my friends. It's kind of a song saying that when I'm going through my trials, I'll stand as strong as I can on my own but I need you to promise me that when I'll fall you'll be there. That song is a pretty emotional one for me. I love the lyrics. I will have to post them sometime.

Ok. I'm done blabbering now. Thank you for reading this post. I love you. Ha, ha =)

Erika

Two weeks of November behind us.. here comes the Chirstmas decorations.

Well. The tree is almost up. And the village is coming soon. Not to mention the outside lights. And that giant snow globe. Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Ha, ha =)

IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO COME to the school play of Alice in Wonderland TONIGHT and TOMORROW at 7:00, I would definitely appreciate it. I love you guys =) Ha, ha, but I would love you more if you would come ;) I am in it, for those that don't know....

Which is why this is going to be a short blog post. Call time!

Love you!!

Erika

P.S. - Watch this. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgknSYq0yNs

November already?

I sure as heck can't believe it's the last week of October. Where did this month go!? Wow... well... That's crazy.

NOW, I meant to make this post like last Sunday, but never found the time. SO, here we go. Every Wednesday night for the next 3 weeks, WPSH is playing Holly's Lawson songs on the radio. Holly is a 16 year old from MI who has the most amazing voice on the face of the planet. I've been following her on Youtube for quite a while. She's super sweet and is amazing at everything she does. If you'd like to check her out, go to www.youtube.com/user/hollycheerbb22. If you'd like to listen in this Wednesday at 6:30 MST, please go to www.wpsh.net and click on the 'listen now' link. You'll love what you hear, promise!

Last night was super fun. I went to Ikea with Tiffany Howard. We had dinner there and then played hide and seek through the store. Until we were kicked out, that is. Ha, ha!

RIP Kara, who was also hid and killed by a car yesterday. 2 things I'm starting to really hate: Cars & Cancer. :P

Please keep Tay in your prayers as her health has started to fall a slight bit.
Thanks guys!!

Love you!

Erika

Blood, Love, Hope, Lust, Steam (And a very special Happy Birthday!)

Happy 18th birthday sweet angel, Katelyn Marie Thelma Mikolasy! Yesterday was Kat's birthday. We went to the cemetery, had cake, and released balloons into the air. There were a few people there other than just my family. It was wonderful =)

Now, as for the Blood, Love, Hope, Lust, Steam part.. well.. to say the least, THE NEW SUGARLAND ALBUM (THE INCREDIBLE MACHINE) CAME OUT TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For those of you that are crazy and don't know how obsessed I am with Sugarland, now is time for you to learn. You just learned that you know the #1 Sugarland fan in the history of the world. I got the deluxe edition of the CD (of course) and I'm watching the video of their Incredible Machine tour right now. Jennifer Nettles is totally rocking that hoop skirt. Yeah, no one knows what I'm talking about. I swear I've been waiting for this for like, 3 years. Just amazing! I love all of the songs. Really, guys, go buy the album, you won't regret it.

Now that we have that excitement over with, let's move on to more important stuff. First off, POSSIBLE BENEFIT CONCERT for Taylor Love coming up in the next month. Now, EMPHASIZE POSSIBLE as much as you can, I don't know if it will actually happen. Let me know if you'd be interested in attending, or for that matter, it is a semi - open mic performance concert, so if you'd like to perform, shoot me a message or just comment here.

RIP Madison Mecum, who was hit and killed by a car two Thursdays ago. Miss and love you forever sweet girl!

Lets see, what else do I have to say today? Hm, well, I won an autographed poster of Sugarland yesterday. Yeah, Holly, if you are reading this, it's true. But then again, you have your own, so it's not that impressive. I'm catching up to yah! Ha, ha.

I believe that is all for now =) Pretty exciting post there, wasn't it? Yeah, sure.

Love you all!

"Little Miss You'll Go Far"

Barrettes, Competitions, Who Knows What!

Stef (the friend of mine who is selling the Taylor Love Barrettes with me) told me today that we sold 100 Barrettes! Thank you Miriam Castle for helping us get there!!!! =) If any of you are interested.. you know, you can always shoot me an email, respond to this post, or give me a call! =) Thanks guys!

Now, get this, I'm in this competition, this poetry competition, and I just found out I was selected to move on to the semifinals! There are only NINE other semifinalists in the competition!! I would post the poem I am competing with, but the truth is, I don't remember which one it was.. I've submitted so many I get utterly lost sometimes when they just give me a title to my poem. =) Also, with this, I am being published again! You know last time when I said that excitement just never wears off? It's still going strong on me. I was dancing around my room for a good hour or so, still can't believe it =)

This week is Fall Break, so my dad is taking my brother and I to California. We're going to Disneyland and all, the whole shiz-bang. Ha, ha. =)

Have yourselves a wonderful week ahead of yah! Make it beautiful! Xoxo!

Erika

Miles for Melanie.. and Faith

SOOOOOOOOOO.. I was gonna do this post like, last Saturday, but here it is on Wednesday. Oh well. Anyways, Saturday I ran a 5k for a friend of mine, Melanie, and it was a little bit in memory of Faith. I finished with a time of 32 minutes, and it was a lot of fun.
Tay is home and doing well =) Hallelujah!
Ok, now, I don't know if I've posted this before.. but I have something exciting to tell y'alls. I am going to be recording a CD in the near future!! Yes! My own CD! More info later =)
Love ya!

Erika

Photo Contest

Goooooooooood gosh..... heyo!
I just wanted to let you all know that I got 2nd in a photo contest at the Children's Medical Center in DC!!! I was so excited! =) Here is the photo:

Fun Weekend =)

Crazy good weekend here. So, Friday night I took Caroline out to her yearly birthday dinner, we went to Pizzza Pie Cafe and it was so much fun. After we watched Diary of a Wimpy Kid at my house. The movie wasn't like I expected it to be but it was okay. Not one I'd watch again though. I didn't really like it but it was kind of cute to see once. Anyways, then she spent the night at my house and we stayed up until like one in the morning seriously on the floor laughing. Oh it was so fun. The next morning my grandma came over and we cleaned the house for my mom to pay her back for dinner. For some reason Caroline stuck around and we made lunch for my family. After that my grandma left Caroline and I went to the Bean Museum and then we walked over to the Wilkinson's Center to go bowling. When we were just outside of the Wilkinson's Center, we ran into Brit! She was a crisis counselor at the school when Kat died, so I got to know her pretty well. I showed her my poetry and we had a lot of fun together. Anyways, until July of this year I hadn't seen her since the summer of 5th grade. Then, on the 3rd of July, Vivian and I were at the Freedom Festival in downtown Provo getting dinner when I ran into Brit there. Weird, I know! I was so excited to see her! Anyways, I only got to see her really quickly and then we left to go to Stadium of Fire. But that's not the point. The point is I haven't seen her in forever and there she was in the weirdest place again! Ha, ha, I was so happy to see her. She's a really good friend of mine and I've missed her a ton. She gives the best hugs!
Any who, then we went bowling and had a fabulous time, walked home, and then Caroline went home after that. It was wayyy fun!
Today I got sick. My sinus infection came back so if I start fainting again in school y'all will know why. I hope it doesn't get as bad as it did last time.
Today, as you might know, is the Taylor Love Triathlon! I was so sad I missed it this year, last year it was in the summer so we were able to go. Not this year. Anyways, I heard it went really well and it was a lot of fun and raised a ton of money. Yay!
Also, I got a Youtube account, and I'm debating whether to start posting cover videos up on it or not. You tell me. Think I should? Be honest.
Hope you have all had a beautiful weekend!
Well, I'm out, I smell brownies in the other room, I better go check that out. Love you!

Erika

Happy day =)

Heyo my little blog followers =) Good afternoon! Happy almost Friday!! Remember a few days ago when I said forgive me if I don't post for a month.. yeah.. well, I would assume you would already know to ignore that. Ha, ha.

Now, I have some super exciting news! I got an essay I wrote published today. Yes, another! EEEPPPP!! I'm so excited. This is one I wrote about Faith. I will have to post it here as soon as I can.. don't have too much time right now or I would!

Anyways, also, this guy who works for my dad is gonna let me use his recording studio or something to do my own cover CD! Whoo hoo =) I'm so excited.. more info later if you'd like to hear some of my stuff!

Also, I know on my "Buzz" post on Gmail I said I would start updating more on Taylor as much as I could.. ignore that for a little while. I promise I will start updating more, and her mom also said she would try to get on top of the blog, (Craaazzzzzy life!) so be watching! I don't promise how often though... ;)

Anyways, I am off to my voice lesson! Love you! Big hugs to all!!

Erika

Blahhh...

Oh heck. I'm 110% worn out from this week already, and it's just the beginning! Ahhh!! How am I going to survive until November with this CRAAZZZY schedule! EEEP! :P

I hope your week is going a whole lot better than mine. You know when you build up enough and then you just can't take anything anymore? That's kind of how I'm feeling these days. I miss Faith. I miss Noelle. I miss Annie. I miss Ava. I miss Bro Babb. I miss LoRee. I miss Jeanee. I miss Jessica. I miss Audrey. And freak, I miss Critter.

In happy news, I finally decided I would post that poem that like 4 people have emailed me asking to put up. So, here you go little people! This is a poem I wrote about my angel and my hero, my Vivian girl. It's not my best but.. you asked...


She's so much more than an angel, so much more than a friend
She's someone there to pick me up when I'm on my knees again
She's my comfort and my home when I feel I'm drowning in my fears

And she always had a hand to help me wipe away my tears

She always does so much for me, and I can't understand why
Every kind thing she says gives me a reason to try
When I feel like I've lost my battle, she reminds me I've still won the war
She gives me strength to stand up again and face the trials of this world

If angles walk among us, I think that I've found mine
She goes above and beyond for a girl not worth her love, her trust, her time
I cant figure out why she loves with with all shes ever had
Why she's always there for me to talk to when I am sad

I would say that I've been blessed, but I feel so much more
I cant believe that she's my special friend, she's all I could ever ask for
She's the first one I thank God for in my prayers at night
And I hope that His most loving angels will keep her in their sight


So, that's about it for tonight. I have homework I must go do :P Oh! Speaking of which.. remember that "6" page "essay" I told you about? Oh... well.. it got a little longer today. We're talking ten pages. TEN!!! T-E-N!! Can you believe it? I sure can't. I've never written this much about anything or anyone. Wow. =)

Love you all!

Erika

Missing my little Faith..

So, here I had this really amazing dream last night... I was watching my Katelyn just pace around in Heaven.. like she was waiting for something. She started running somewhere so I followed her. I kept shouting her name but she couldn't hear me. I followed her for a while, and I kept seeing people I knew just... doing stuff.. I don't know. Anyways, Critter went into this... tunnel thing and when I saw her again on the other end I saw her and Faith embraced in the biggest hug I've ever seen. Then Kat took her by the hand and took her over to Jesus where He welcomed her with a big smile and a hug, and then Critter took her off somewhere and started showing her around. It was so sweet! I hope that Critter did welcome Faith into her arms. Hope she took her out to lunch the first day she came home. ;)
Anyways, I'm kind of missing her, but I thought that was really cool.
Love you forever Faith!! Xoxoxo!!

Now, as for those poems I said I'd post... be patient with me! I will get them soon enough ;)

Love you guys!

Erika

;P

Good morning! Wow! Saturday at last! I've been soo busy this week, most days I haven't been getting home from school until anytime between 6-8 at night each day now. I now have rehearsal for our school play everyday after school until 5 or 5:30ish, by the time we get home it's usually closer to 6, if we go home. Mondays I have guitar lessons until 6:30, Thursdays I have voice lessons until 6. Crazy! By the time I get all my homework done and and the other stuff I have to do, I usually get to sit back and breathe around 9 or so at night. Then it's off to bed for the next day. Crazzyy!!

But I have some exciting news =) First off, Tay has been home for over a week now! Fantastic, I know. I'm so excited for her. I got to talk to her for the first time is almost a month last night. I sang her a song I've been learning on my guitar for quite a while - You Give me Love by Faith Hill. She absolutely loved it =) it was great to hear the smile in her voice as she thanked me. Tay is doing well and everything is going great.

Second, I got a better part in the play. I am now doing a quintet. For those of you who don't know musical terms, I'm singing a song with five other people. But... it has its downside. I have to dress up like a lobster. Yes, you heard me right, a lobster. Laugh all you want, at least I have a part! ;)

Also, I've been writing like crazy these last few days. What started out as an innocent poem turned into a 6 page essay on my hero, Vivian. And it's not even stopping at 6 pages, I'm still going. =) Also I have a few new poems I will post here soon.

As for Faith, she passed away the other day. The cancer took a hold of her body and brought her back home to God. It's hard loosing someone you look at as closer than a friend, almost a sister, that you love with all you have, but I know she's strong and healthy on the other side with all the other angels. I hope Katelyn found her and welcomed her with a big hug from me =)

3rd week of school over, I'm loving the whole middle school thing. I have tons of new friends and I love all my classes and teachers. It's so fun.

The Stand Up 2 Cancer Benefit Concert/Telethon was last night. It went well, they raised a bunch and some of it went to the Children's Cancer Research Center in DC, where Tay spent a few days this summer.

Anyways, forgive me if I don't update for like a month because my life is gonna start getting extra crazy. Love you all!!

Erika

Hello September!

September is one of my favorite months. Why? It's National Childhood Cancer Awareness Month. LOTS of events coming and going this month, for Faith and Taylor. Taylor has a Triathlon in Herndon (VA) coming up on the 19th, her annual Splash 'n Dash for Taylor Love was yesterday, and her Barrettes for Taylor fundraiser is underway once again! As for Faith, there will be a 5k for her (or in honor of her..) on the 18th just outside of Washington DC (Usually, Faith's run is held outside of SLC but since Faith has been receiving treatment at the Children's National Medical Center in DC the run will be held there instead.), and they will be starting a fundraiser for her in the near future (more info on that asap).
To start off September on the right foot, Taylor went home 2 days ago! Hallelujahs! It's so amazing to see a little girl everyone thought would die before she was two years old coming home after such a long battle this summer and in the years past. She will still be going back to the hospital twice a week, more if needed, but at least she's not there 24/7. She is so excited to be home, as well as the rest of her family. =)

September also brought around a few good things for me. I just got another poem published, yay! This one is extra special because it is one I wrote for Vivian, and she means so much to me. I am super excited. I will post the poem later =) It's not one of my best, but at least it's published.
I also made the cast for the school play, Alice in Wonderland! I am kind of just an extra (my part is a "wonderland creature"), but at least I am in it. There were only like 4 seventh graders that got in the play, so I feel pretty good. To even get a callback is a huge compliment.

Yesterday was the Timpanogos Storytelling Festival. Lots of fun! =) Just my dad and I went. We had a great time. We spent most of the afternoon there, it was fantastic. Their performers are so talented!

If y'all get a moment, I would love for you to go check out my friend's Youtube page. She is an amazing singer and I think you'd like her if you took a look at some of her videos. Please go to http://www.youtube.com/user/hollycheerbb22 and check her out. Thanks!

Now, as for the fundraiser for Taylor, we are selling handmade barrettes. 1 for 3$, 2 for 5$. They are really pretty and come in almost every color. If you are interested, please contact me. If you would like more information, go to Taylorlove.org and go to the "Fundraisers" drop down menu and select "Barrettes for Taylor". Your support is greatly appreciated! Thanks guys!

Erika

Pray, pray, pray!!

Please, please, please, can we get some prayers out for little Faith? I don't believe I've posted much about Faith on my blog before.. so here goes. I met Faith Johnson when she was about 2 years old. She's was the cutest little girl. Only about a month after I met her, our sweet angel Faith developed a rare form of cancer. Neuroblastoma. Kind of like Tay.
Faith's family moved to Washing DC to be treated by the team of expert doctors at the cancer center there. They've been there ever since.
Tonight, 6 year old Faith has come close to dying a few times. Doctors don't think she'll survive long.
Long story made short - pray that we'll have her a little longer.
See more here:

http://prayingforacure-faith.blogspot.com/

Update on sweet Taylor

"Yesterday the mucositis really set in causing Taylor to feel pretty crudddy. Last night an NG tube was placed to allow us to get nutrients into her system that she is no longer able to tolerate through her mouth. The NG tube placement was quick but it caused Taylor to gag & begin to vomit. There were 4 of us in here trying to support her at that time while the tube was not quite secured & she could not stop heaving. The pain & discomfort she was in at the time was clear, she had tears in her eyes, she was sweating and shaking with each contraction. When all was said and down, Taylor looked pretty beat up but rallied shortly after to play with some dolls she had received for all of her hard work." (For complete post please go to Taylorlove.org)

Post from Aimee Love.

Love you forever little Tay! Keep holding on!

I forgot a title again..

So, last night was the first round of Davis County's Got Talent.. it didn't go as well as I had hoped but I'm glad I did it. I was SO nervous, so I started a little off tune which messed up my whole performance. I was the first to perform, so I was kind of used as the guinea pig. Out of 32 contestants they only picked 5 to go on, and there were a lot of amazing acts so I'm not surprised I didn't make it to the next round. They only sent on like two singers. The rest were "unique". My brother went on, he yo-yo-ed.
I think I could've done a lot better, yeah, but I'm glad I did it. I just hope I really did make Critter and Vivian proud because that's winning for me.

Now, onto some other stuff =) School starts next Monday. I'm kind of excited but I'm REALLY gonna miss the summer because this was the best summer ever. I'm gonna especially miss going to the Amphitheater every Friday night with Vivian. ;) Next summer seems like too far away!

Tay is doing fine, for those of you that have asked. So far there are no complications or any signs that her body won't accept the marrow. Hallelujahs!

Also, for those who know about Faith, she is doing well also. She had to have a surgery the other day to remove a tumor from her stomach but is recovering and doing well =)

A friend of mine passed away after a courageous battle with cancer the other day. RIP Jeanne, miss your sweet smile!

I think that's all for now. See you all soon!

Xoxo,
♥/Erika

Oh yeah! A title!

Hello! Ok, so now, this post is gonna be a little crazy so keep up with me =)

We'll start off with California. What a blast!!! Ah, it was fantastic. The first Friday we were there we went down to San Louis Obispo. That night we went down to the beach and then just hung out at the hotel. Saturday we went to Hearst Castle. If you don't know what that is go look it up, I can't find words to describe it! It's BEAUTIFUL! Totally amazing. After that we did this REALLY looonng but really pretty drive along the coast, went to the Elephant-Seal Observatory (Oh, how that was interesting..), and down to Fisherman's Wharf in Monterey, and over to our hotel in Salines. The next day we drove up to San Francisco and went to the SF Zoo and to the Oakland Temple. Then over to our hotel in Oakland. =) Monday morning we took the ferry over to SF and spent the day running around there. We ran into my YW leader in SF, that was funny. Spent that night over in Oakland again. The next day we drove across the Golden Gate Bridge, went over to the Temple again so we could go on the terrace. Yeah, a terrace, on top of a temple. It was beautiful. Then over to the Jelly Belly Factory and on to Sacramento. Went to the Sacramento Temple and then to bed. Tuesday we went to the capital, the SacZoo, and over to Old Sacramento to the train museum and stuff. =) Then we flew home that night. So fun!

Now over to today. Just about a two week jump. ;) Well, yesterday and then day before were REALLY stressful because it was a friend of mine's funeral and Tay was having a bone marrow transplant. The transplant was really risky because the donor wasn't a relative to Tay. But thankfully, everything went well.
Also, this Wednesday is the Davis County Fair! That means their talent competition is coming up soon! I'm SO nervous! Can't wait to do it though =)

AND FINALLY, if anyone hasn't heard God's Will by Martina McBride, you need to. It is a BEAUTIFUL, POWERFUL, AMAZING song! Kinda made me cry. The music video is SO sad!

Lots of love!
Big hugs!
♥/Erika

Perfectness =)

Quick post here for you guys today!! I have been in CA for a week or so and have been SO busy before and after that I haven't had anytime at all to blog! Anyways, more on my trip coming, I promise! But for this post I gotta talk about last night - it was extraordinary!!
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO......... last night I went to the Due West concert at the Sandy Amphitheater with with Vivian (again.. ;)). But this time was special =) I finally got that guitar I've been talking about FOREVER, and I had it with me that night to give it to her. She had no idea =) it was so special! When I pulled it out of the back of the car and she saw it, she started crying. Oh, she couldn't believe it. She just kept asking why I would do something like that for her. It was fantastic =)
So after that we went to the concert, but about half way through we had to stop the concert for a few minutes because it started POURING down rain and lightninging and thundering and the whole deal! It was so cool! And cold =)
After about ten minutes they started it again.
Then about a half hour before the concert ended, Vivs leaned over to me and said "I love my guitar, I really do. It's beautiful. Why would you ever think of doing something like that for me?". I started trying to tell her how much she means to me, and she bounced back and started calling me her angel. It was so sweet! Anyways, she made me cry, and I made her cry, and it was really awesome. I love that girl! ♥

♥ /Erika

.. =) ♥ ♫

"Just when you think life could never get any better... it slaps you in the face with another great surprise"
Last night was the best! I went to another FANTASTIC concert with Vivs! Oh, it was great. We saw Charley Jenkins =) Whoo! He's so cute. Ha.. ha!
It was so fun! Vivian is the best!
And Charley was awesome too =)
ANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNDDDDD I gotta meet

Lindsey Stirling

From America's Got Talent!
It was so cool!!
Ahhhhhhhhh, how I love life!
Good times, good times.
AMEN!

Xoxo!
♥/Erika

Lotsa loves and wows

Whoa! It's been FOREVER since I last wrote! I've had two pretty great weeks since I wrote last. Last week was pretty uneventful except I went to a concert with Vivian again both Friday and Saturday. Friday we went to a western group, Restless Hearts. They were way fun. My grandparents came that day. Saturday we saw an acapella group called Eclipse. This was really fun until about intermission. At intermission I got a call from a friends mom, and my friend had a blood infection because of a surgery she had earlier that week. The infection was really bad so they didn't think she'd make it through the night. Only about a half hour later I got another call that she had passed away. I was sad, but I felt bad for Vivian because her daughter died last year also because of a blood infection. Because of my friend, Vivian started crying cuz of her daughter. I felt bad but it was sweet and I'm really glad I could have that experience with her.
Anyways, it was way fun.
The next week was girl's camp. It was my first year, and boy was it fun!! I loved it! I had the best time. The girls were so fun to be with, and our leaders were so funny. Workshops, Boring Flag Ceremonies, Harmless Pranks, Secret Sisters, Good Food, Testimonies and Bishop's Night, Boxers up the Flag Pole, and LOTS and LOTS of fun! Good memories.. =) I'll post more later.
Yesterday I started learning a new song on my guitar. It's called Streets of Heaven by Sherrie Austin. It's sad but I LOVE it. I'm playing it for Tay's parents soon. It's a hard song but I can do hard things ;)
Today was amazing. Patsy and Bruce (Kat's parents) came over today. They were here for a while, then we went over to the Wallace's (Anna's and Brita's) home and Patsy gave us all of our souvenirs she got us from Hawaii. After, they came back over here and I played them a song that I wrote for 'em (mostly Patsy but Bruce was in there too.. =)). By the end, Patsy was crying. It felt so good. She never cries, she's not that emotional, and I made her cry. I felt.. amazing. My life goal was to make her cry and I never thought I'd do it and here I am tonight saying I did it. After the song she embraced me in the biggest hug. Then they had to leave, so we started walking down the hall, and about half way down the hall she turned around and embraced me in another hug. Then, her voice shaking, says "I want you to know how much you mean to me. I love you soo much." It made me feel soooo good! She's never told me I meant something to her like she did tonight. I felt.. amazing.
Sometimes, I love life.
"It's a carnival ride but I'm so glad you're on it with me."

Xoxo!
♥/Erika

♥

Last night was Stadium of Fire. Nothing special, and not really out of the ordinary. I've gone a couple times so I know what it's like. But this year was Carrie Underwood, and I got to go with a girl I love.
Vivian came with me last night =) She's a close friend of my grandparents, so I already knew her somewhat well. We went to dinner at the freedom festival downtown. First amazing thing of the night - Brit was there! Ah, Brittany, Brittany, Brittany. I love that girl. She's the sweetest. I haven't seen her for about a year, so it was way special that she was there.
After dinner we went straight to the stadium. It was so fun. We didn't listen to anything they were saying or doing and didn't pay attention to any of the opening acts. We just kept poking each other and talking and complaining to the staff member that Carrie wasn't on yet. I think the only thing that we paid attention to was the part where they presented the colors and brought in each of the branches of the military. This was way special to the both of us. Especially for me because I have had a few friend's have their dads or brothers injured or killed in the war. Of course, me being the emotional person I am, this part made me cry. After that we went back to poking and talking and teasing. =)
When Carrie came on, the party got started. Vivian was HILARIOUS. She made me get up and dance with her. It was so fun. We had our arms around each other the whole time and she kept hugging me. That was special. =)
Temporary Home or Undo It were probably my favorite songs of the night. I was way upset she didn't do Independence Day or I Told you So. Rawr.
Vivian and I walked home after. So fun. I really got to know the girl and got to get to love her. It was so way fun. After she kept emailing me how special it was for her so I felt totally awesome. Best 4th of July ever.

Xoxo!
♥/Erika

"It's hard to say goodbye.. cause baby it's a good life"

In 2 months, I have lost 7 of my closest friends, neighbors, and some of the best people I've had in my life.

May 8 - Jessica was hit in a car crashed and died that night
May 10 - Audrey had a severe asthma attack and died that morning
June 2 - Bro Babb, the man who sealed me to my family in the temple, passed away when he fell and stopped breathing
June 6 - LoRee, a close friend of mine, passed away and they don't know the reason why
June 14 - Noelle passed away because she fell while hiking
June 21 - Annabelle left this world due to heart complications
June 29 - Ava died because her kidneys stopped working


It's been a roller coaster ride. I've been in some of the darkest places of my life and experienced some of the most joyous moments at the same time. I love you guys!

Never wears off

The excitement, the rush, of being published, well it never wears off. It's an amazing accomplishment.. and amazes me more than most with the stuff I'm dealing with now.

My poem was dedicated to a little girl I've known for about 3 years now. She has been battling a very rare and difficult cancer since she was 18 months old. She has had to undergo a number of treatments due to this cancer, Neuroblastoma, as doctors try to find a cure. She has been through over 11 surgeries (and she's only 5 years old, that's about two surgeries a year) along with blood platelet transfusions, CAT, MRI, and Nuclear scans, bone marrow biopsies, stem cell harvests, radiation treatment to head, orbits, and abdomen, Phase I radiation immunotherapy trial, and Phase II antibody immunotherapy.
Little Miss Taylor is now battling a new form of cancer. Chemo-Induced Leukemia has taken over the poor child's body.
Please pray for Taylor, and donate money if you can.
Go to http://taylorlove.org or www.facebook.com/lovetaylorlove to learn more about Taylor, Neuroblastoma, Chemo-Induced Leukemia, and children like Taylor battling these deadly cancers.

Oh, and here's the poem I wrote ;-)

Truly amazing as she fights her way
Agonizing everyday
Yelling, screaming, crying for help
Loathing all the pain that's felt
Ordinary, that's all she wants to be
Relieved from treatment, feeling free

Loving life while she's got the chance
Opening her heart, feeling the dance
Very fearful for when she might die
Everyone is blessed to have her in their life

A Bunch of Songs!

Whoo hoo! I finally started guitar lessons after about 2 months of teaching myself online!! I love my teacher. His name is Dave. He likes guitar. I like guitar. We have a lot in common.
I'm playing a bunch of songs now. I can play:

Last Kiss by Pearl Jam
Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Green Day
Fall into Me by Sugarland
We Run by Sugarland
The Night the Lights Went out in Georgia by Reba McEntire
I'll Keep on Loving You by Reba McEntire
Angel by Sarah McLachlan
I Will Remember You by That Guy That I Don't Know His Name
Good Riddance by Greenday
Twist and Shout by the Beatles
Fancy by Reba
When You Say Nothing at All by Allison Kraus
Streets of Heaven by Sherrie Austin
How Great Thou Art
Temporary Home by Carrie Underwood (WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOO!!!)
and I Told You So by Carrie Underwood (Ok.. I know it wasn't by her.. but it's her version.)

I love it!! Haha :-)

Life is Good...

Today was my friend Hannah Campbell's birthday party.. so fun! We went and decorated cakes at her aunts professional kitchen! Mine ended up looking pretty stupid.. but it tasted pretty good :-)
I also went bowling with my best friend Caroline! Oh man. So fun. We bowled with skittles. Before each turn, we would pick a skittle out of a bag. Each color meant something different.
For example:
Orange - We had to use the little kiddie ramp.
Yellow - Had to bowl on your knees.
Green - Bowl on one leg. That was hard.
Purple - Bowl with the hand you don't usually bowl with.
Red - Oh man. This one was embarrassing. Bowl backwards in between your legs. Ha.

There were a lot of Yellows and Greens. Only 2 Oranges and 6 Reds were found in the bag.

After we bowled, we ate J-Dawgs, chips, and candy until we were sick. Then we played with my bouncy ball and laughed until we were rolling on the floor - literally! Oh man. I love friends who are just as crazy as me.

Now.. it's finally the weekend. And not only that.. it's the last weekend before SUMMER!!!!!!! Hallelujahs!!

On the down side.. my dog ate a whole jar of her vitamins and we had to call poison control. They think she's gonna be okay but we gotta watch her for a couple days. Always makes me nervous :-/

Oh today... You were.. ah.. well.. slightly wonderful

If the best and the worst day could be combined into one... that would be today. Today was one of those days where you realized how much you loved someone who's slipped away. Today was also a day that you wanted to hug everyone because you feel so loved. :-)

Heartbreak

This is for all the men and women fighting in the field for our country. Thank you for your service.

I'm so sorry to the families who have suffered loss or heartbreak.

It's like a battle cry
Calling out your name
Wishing you were here with me

Its so hard to think
Of letting you go,
Of letting you leave

And I will try to give you my all
Just as long as you promise me
You'll answer when I call, Oh oh

Just promise me you'll never break my heart
Just tell me that you'll make it safely home
Cause I know what its like, to feel alone, Oh oh
Just tell me that you know this isn't a mistake,
Cause I don't want to wait around, for the heartbreak

As the war goes on,
I just miss you more,
Wondering how long this will last

Thinking of tomorrow,
But holding on to the past

And I will try to give you my all
Just as long as you promise me
You'll answer when I call, Oh oh

Just promise me you'll never break my heart
Just tell me that you'll make it safely home
Cause I know what its like, to feel alone, Oh oh
Just tell me that you know this isn't a mistake,
Cause I don't want to wait around, for the heartbreak

And I dont know what to do,
Hold on or let go of you
And I know that your on the field,
But I need you to be my shield

And do the things you need to do,
I'll be waiting here, for you
And I know that your there to fight,
So just be brave you'll be alright

And I will try to give you my all
Just as long as you promise me
You'll answer when I call, Oh oh

Just promise me you'll never break my heart
Just tell me that you'll make it safely home
Cause I know what its like, to feel alone, Oh oh
Just tell me that you know this isn't a mistake,
Cause I don't want to wait around,
Yeah I dont want to wait around,
For the heartbreak

There are people you love in this world. For example: I love Joni and Critters and Jess'ca. I love Anna and Brita and Nicole and Caroline. I love Patsy and Audrey and Brooke and Taylor and Brit. And I love Lynne and Julie and Katie and Kristin and Rebekah.
I've lost two people I love within almost one short year of each other. But what I've lost is nothing compared to what one of my best friends lost. My best friend lost her father, and now her brother due to war. Men like this are fighting and dying everyday. Why can't we just end the war? What is so special about sending troops on the field to die? What's so wrong with peace?

This is for you, sweet girlie Dawn. I love you bunches. RIP to your brother and your dad. Because my heroes, and your heroes, are wearing combat boots.

He sees the broken bodies around him
He waits for the war cry
And wonders if he'll make it home
To tell his baby son goodbye

The fear is all around him
The death of a good friend
His holds the letter he received today close
Lets his heart hold his love in

He's fighting for my freedom
His love for his country shows
But his light shines through his invisible cape
Because my hero wears army clothes

My poor Cooper

My fluffy, somewhat ugly, sweet, cute (sort of), funny dog was shaved today. What a tradgedy. Words cannot explain, but a picture is worth a thousand words. Check out the before and after pics.

Happy Mothers Day!!!

Happy Mothers Day to my favorite mommy in the whole world!!! I love you!!! You're the bestest and I'm so thankful for all you do for me!! I'm so lucky to have you!! I'm really glad I was adopted into this family because if God hadn't placed me here, I wouldn't be the person I am today. No one can say, but I think I would've been doing the wrong things and making the wrong choices. But because God went through all the trouble to get me into this family, I'm loved by people who help me make the right choices. And I'm so happy because of it. I love you mommy!!! Xoxo

Poem

I've had friends loose friends, grandparents, siblings, daughters, sons, cousins, aunts, nephews, uncles, other relatives, mothers, fathers, and other people close to them. This past week one of my best friends lost her two best friends, one after the other. This is dedicated to her, and to all the others who have lost the one they were fighting for, the one they love the most.


I'm so sorry that there were no farewells

We ran out of time for goodbyes

I know, I was taken too quickly

But God had a reason why

I was greeted with the biggest hug

As He wrapped His arms around me tight

He smelled so sweet, He smelled like rain

And felt like a blanket in the dark of night

Angels also welcomed me

Greetings with hugs and tears

You see, not only God missed me
While I was on Earth for so many years

Dear friend, I miss you so

And I'm with you every day

I try to help you though the trials

And guide you through the pain

But there is was thing I forgot to tell you

Before my life on Earth was through

You're my angel and I love you with all my heart

And remember, God loves you too

"Do it for the one you love most"

There was a girl I knew. She changed my life. She showed me that there was more to life than just living it. And that it's more important to love than to live.
Her name was Kat.
Kat passed away a year and two months ago on March 6,2009 after accidentally being shot in the face with a pistol.
She was amazing. Her death shocked everyone. Why would God take someone the world loved so dearly? And why take her so shorty after she arrived with us?
It almost felt like God had made a mistake. That Kat wasn't supposed to be there at that moment, that it should've been someone else.
I'm sure Kat never gave up. I'm sure she wanted to stay down here. I'm sure she didn't want to see her family and friends in pain because of her death. But I also think she was ecstatic to go to a better place where she could be with her family and watch over them from a different perspective. And I know she was crying tears of joy when God picked her up in His arms and welcomed her home.
Kat always told me whenever I felt like giving up to keep going and to do it for the one I love the most. That's why everyone who knew Kat is going on living without her. We're doing it for the one we love most. We're doing it for Kat.

=D

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